Your Life's Direction

I recently purchased a program called "The Modern Siren". I'm not really sure how I feel about it. Some of the points have validity, but there are some visualization tools that seem a little strange to me. I'm not sure how or why they would be used. Two things that the speaker, Rori Raye, talked about when I was listening today really made me think:

• Look at a man as an opportunity to heal your past (consider any dates or relationships with a man free therapy!)
• You can see a progression in how you are on the inside by the guys that show up on the outside.

The second point really hit home. I've been doing a lot of work on myself for a long time, but it's been 4 years since I've been in a long term relationship. Until hearing that last point, I thought I had made some pretty good progress. Now, I'm not so sure. Thinking about Mr. Army makes me wonder since I've dating other guys that have clearly shown more interest. Why am I putting up with it or even thinking about it? Why don't I just tell him things aren't progressing the way I would like and say goodbye? That says something, and once again it comes back to my confidence and esteem (or lack thereof!). I know I deserve the best and to be treated like a queen. I know I'm a good person: compassionate, caring, fun to be around, responsible, etc. etc. and that any guy should feel lucky to have me around.....So why can't I act like that? This is the basis of "The Modern Siren" program. Apparently, Sirens are a part of mythology and were angelic women that were able to draw men to them with their strong, feminine vibes and nothing else. I'm going to try to put in place at least some of the strategies in this program since I might as well try something different!

My trip to Virginia to visit my best friend's twins really made me think about where I am in my life right now. My friend and I have had similar dating experiences but she is now married to a great guy and has the babies that she has been dreaming of. I'm so happy for her because she definitely deserves all of this happiness! On the other hand, her happiness has made me think more seriously about my life and how dissatisfied I am. I started my teaching job 11 years ago which was probably the last "big" thing to happen in my life. Since that time, I have experienced everyone else's life changing, except mine....so, what's the deal? My whole teaching career has been spent in one place, but after this school year, that will be coming to an end. My precious school will be closing and my close-knit family will transfer and be absorbed into a much larger, more complicated school. I am missing my friend and her twins terribly, sick of this winter weather, and dreading the end of this school year. It seems like this is a crossroad in my life and I am really wondering what direction my life should take...